This is a particularly meaningful teaching for me today. There are certain types of people that when I’m in a relationship with them, I lose myself. They can be wonderful, loving, and just great people. But what they have in common is an intensity of pain over years and years that I struggle to be around. So what happens is that because I love them and they are ultimately good people, I convince myself that I need to be more understanding, compassionate, whatever so I can accept them as they are and let them have whatever feelings and experiences they need to have. It looks so nice on paper, but then throw in my shadow and the fact that I’m an empath and I do not do well.
Continued exposure to an individuals deep and intense pain triggers something inside me that sends me into such a cycle of doubt and self-recrimination. In short, my boundaries suck with people like that. So I start a covert defensive reaction to them that involves control and manipulation. I delude myself into believing that I have the power to make them better but really I need them to get better so I can feel relief. In order to do all that I have to toss honesty right out the window. The thought of facing someone and saying to them, “I love you. You’re a wonderful person, but I can’t be in a relationship with you because I don’t know how to maintain my boundaries when I’m with you.” WHAT! And yet that’s exactly what I need to do. And because I didn’t I just recently lost a friend in a way that involved my shadow behavior and dishonesty. I’ve learned over the course of my life that honesty is sacred to me. It’s so important to me that I try and focus on it as much as I can in myself and all my relationships. But there are times that I don’t even see my shadow behavior until it comes to a head and the person I’m in a relationship with points out my behavior and says, “That is unacceptable and I won’t tolerate it.” Thank goodness one of us was in touch with them selves enough to call it what it was.
Honesty is clean, simple, and ultimately loving for all involved. It can be scary and hard to act on, yet I believe it is one of the main ingredients on the path to enlightenment. I’m grateful for the reminder today to practice honesty in all aspects of my life today and every day.
Thank you so much for watching today’s video on honesty. Please leave a comment below or on my Youtube channel and tell me if honesty is important to you.
Love,
Danielle
Danielle, and Mother God,
Thank you so very much for the video i was going through a hard time in my life with my brother and dad, that i had asked for guidance from Mother God the other day and then today, when Honesty came out it was like she was speaking directly to me just when i needed it the most thank you so very much for your video’s they have helped me in a time of need, more ways than one. Thanks again Both of you I love you Both very much.
Kim Brevelle
You’re very welcome Kim. I’m glad it was what you needed. Mother has amazing timing. Thank you for watching and sharing. Hugs to you.
I find myself listening intently especially Mothers’ comments at the end about ” expressing yourself honestly with kindness – owning what you feel, owning your perception, owning your fears, owning your joys, your own laughter, your own sexuality,
your own body, your own mind, your own Heart……..” I feel on these levels it is challenging to always know these things about myself period – without much deep introspection, and that then interacting with others then requires a very refined integration of knowing oneself in this way….. I trust in this as truth – it is more challenging to put this in practice…….
I agree Deborah. I find it challenging as well. Thank goodness for my daily practice of going within and writing about what I find. It’s a life saver. Thank you so much for watching and sharing!